The Heart Always Knows
Dating a former deejay can be daunting.
When I took Terrie to her first Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes concert in Durham, N.C. in February 2015, I just hoped she’d enjoy the music. Having lived for years in the South and being a deejay for top 40 and country stations, she wasn’t familiar with Southside Johnny’s music, though she’d heard of the group.
She left that first concert not quite fully buying into the band, which was OK by me. She hadn’t walked out or asked to leave early.
Terrie and I formally began dating three months later, but you could say the rest of 2015 had its relational ups and downs. We broke up four times in those seven months. During one of those turbulent periods in August, Southside Johnny released what would become the band’s 15th and final original album, Soultime!
I loved Soultime’s 1970s-rooted songs, Southside’s phrasings, and the band’s playfulness and superb playing. Although horn-driven and with a blues-rock feel, nearly every Southside album offers at least one ballad that spotlights his soulful voice. On Soultime!, I was thunderstruck from the first listen to “The Heart Always Knows,” recognizing instantly in its lyrics that it told the story of Terrie and me.
Terrie knew it, too.
We committed to each other for good on New Year’s Eve 2015. In July 2016, for Terrie’s birthday at a local restaurant where our friend and musician, Colin Allured, had a gig, I asked him to learn the “The Heart Always Knows.” After taking her for a spin on the dance floor, I popped the question. Which, to my surprise, gave Terrie a case of the giggles. After asking me to ask her again, she managed to get out “yes.”
Five years later, on our fourth wedding anniversary, Jukes guitarist Glenn Alexander, who we got to know during his pandemic-driven Friday night Facebook Live concerts, did me a favor and played the song. He and his daughter, Oria, an outstanding singer in her own right, delivered a beautiful version on their “Quarantunes” concert, with Oria offering a lovely flute solo.
Today, the lyrics of “The Heart Always Knows” hang in a cherished space on our living room wall amid other symbols of our relationship.
Terrie and I wound up attending seven Southside shows together, and she became an enthusiastic fan who can sing along like any dedicated Jukester. Southside Johnny’s recent decision to stop touring after 50 years to focus on his health brought all of this back into perspective—the power of a musician and music to deeply affect lives.
We both will miss his energetic shows, and the camaraderie of the band and fans. We also recognize that his music will remain forever etched in our lives, something our hearts will always know.